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Oblivion

Jennifer L. Armentrout


  didn’t hear a door close. I knew she was standing there, watching me.

  And I also knew that there was a part of me that cared.

  Later that night, long after Dee was home and asleep, I sat in bed with my laptop open. My finger drifted along the touch pad as I scrolled through the blog.

  Katy’s Krazy Book Obsession.

  I laughed under my breath.

  Good name.

  This wasn’t the first time I’d checked it out. The night Dee had returned from the colony, I’d been taking a look at it. Since then, Kat had added ten more reviews. How in the world had she read that many books in that short period of time? Plus she did these other things. Something called Teaser Tuesdays, which were really just a few lines from some book she was reading. There was In My Mailbox, where she filmed herself talking about the books she had either bought, borrowed, or received from a publisher.

  I’d watched five of those damn videos.

  And every time she picked up a book, her entire face transformed into a wide, brilliant smile, the kind I had yet to see in person and probably never would. She loved those books. No doubt about it.

  I clicked on a sixth video, one that was filmed before she moved here, and was shocked to see a different Katy. She was the same, of course, but there was a light in her eyes that seemed to be out now. I wondered what had turned off Katy’s inner light. I swallowed. It was probably me, treating her like an asshole, interfering in her life and almost getting her killed.

  I closed out the tab and winged my laptop across the room. Before it slammed into the wall, I lifted my hand, stopping the shiny metallic piece of crap before it shattered into thousands of dollars’ worth of tiny pieces. It hovered in the air as if an invisible hand caught it before I slowly lowered it to my desk. I exhaled roughly.

  This evening I had wanted to kiss Kat. There was no fooling myself. And it hadn’t been the first time. Knew it wouldn’t be the last time. I’d already accepted that I was attracted to her, so wanting to act on it made sense. No BFD there.

  Wanting something and doing it were two different things.

  Wanting something and really wanting it were also two different things.

  Kind of like how you can want someone when you don’t even like them?

  Then again, that wasn’t entirely the truth. I did like her. Reluctantly. She was smart. The nerdiness was cute. Her fiery attitude was admirable.

  But I hadn’t been lying when I said that things weren’t like they were for Dawson and Bethany. Those two had…they had been in love with each other and neither of them had stopped for one damn second to think about the consequences.

  The consequences were all I thought about. The memory of Kat in that last video haunted me, telling me more clearly than all of my arguments that I was just no good for her.

  Too bad my body wasn’t getting the message.

  This was going to be a long night, I thought, as I slipped my hand under the sheet and closed my eyes. A very long night.

  Chapter 12

  The first day of school wasn’t exciting to me. For Dee, it was a big deal. The first day of our last year of high school at PHS—that was what she yelled at me when my alarm had gone off for the third time, and we had forty minutes to get ready, eat something, and get to class.

  To me, it was stupid that we started school on a Thursday, had two days of classes, and then had the weekend off. Why didn’t they just start on a Tuesday?

  I barely made it, lucky that I found a pair of jeans and a shirt that was clean. Hell, I was happy that I found a notebook in the back of my car.

  PHS was a small high school compared to most. Only a couple of floors, it was beyond easy to get from one class to the next. Through homeroom and first period, I wondered how Kat was doing. Being the new kid had to suck, especially when you moved to such a small town where everyone had grown up together. Kids around here were friends since they were in diapers.

  It was when I walked into trig class that I saw Kat near the back of the classroom. I spotted a couple of seats empty on the other side of class and knew that’s where I should go.

  Instead, I switched my notebook to my other hand and headed straight down the aisle where she was seated. She kept her eyes glued to her hands, but I knew she was aware of me. The faint blush along the tips of her cheekbones gave her away.

  Remembering how her breath caught the other night on her porch, I grinned.

  But then my gaze slid to the awkward splint covering her slender arm, and my grin faded. Potent rage swept through me at the reminder of how close she’d come to becoming an Arum’s play toy. My teeth gnashed as I stalked past and fell into the seat behind her.

  Images assaulted me of how she’d looked after the Arum attack—shaken, terrified, and so tiny in my shirt as we waited for the useless police to show up. If anything, this should’ve served as a reminder to get my ass up and move to a different seat.

  I pulled a pen out of the spiral ring on my notebook and poked her in the back.

  Kat glanced over her shoulder, biting her lip.

  “How’s the arm?” I asked.

  Her features pinched, and then her lashes swept up, her clear eyes meeting my stare. “Good,” she said, fiddling with her hair. “I get the splint off tomorrow, I think.”

  I tapped my pen off the edge of the desk. “That should help.”

  “Help with what?” Wariness colored her tone.

  Using the pen, I gestured to the trace surrounding her. “With what you’ve got going on there.”

  Her eyes narrowed, and I remembered she couldn’t see what I could. I could’ve clarified, made something up right then, but it was so much fun getting a rise out of her. When it looked like she was two seconds from smacking me upside the head with her splint, I couldn’t help myself.

  I leaned forward, watching her eyes flare. “Fewer people will stare without the splint is all I’m saying.”

  Her lips thinned in disbelief, but she didn’t look away. Kat met my stare and held it. Not backing down—never backing down. Reluctant respect continued to grow inside me, but underneath that, something else was developing. I was two seconds from kissing that pissed-off look right off her face. I wondered what she’d do. Hit me? Kiss me back?

  I was betting on the hitting part.

  Billy Crump let out a low whistle from somewhere off to the side of us. “Ash is going to kick your ass, Daemon.”

  Kat’s eyes narrowed with what looked a lot like jealousy. I smiled, thinking about how she’d asked about Ash and me. I might just need to change my bet. “Nah, she likes my ass too much for that.”

  Billy chuckled.

  I tipped my desk down and leaned forward even farther, bringing our mouths within the same breathing space. A flash of heat went through her eyes, and I so had her. “Guess what?”

  “What?” she murmured, her gaze dropping to my mouth.

  “I checked out your blog.”

  Her eyes shot back to mine. For a second they were wide with shock, but she was quick to smooth her expression. “Stalking me again, I see. Do I need to get a restraining order?”

  “In your dreams, Kitten.” I smirked. “Oh wait, I’m already starring in those, aren’t I?”

  She rolled her eyes. “Nightmares, Daemon. Nightmares.”

  I smiled, and her lips twitched. Dammit, if I didn’t know better, I’d think she liked our little fights, too. Maybe she was just as twisted as I was. The teacher started calling out roll, and Kat turned around. I sat back, laughing softly.

  Several of the kids were still watching us, which kind of knocked the sense back into me. Not that I was doing anything wrong. Teasing her wouldn’t bring the Arum to us or put her in danger—or my sister. When the bell rang, Kat bolted from the class like she was afraid of catching something. Two girls were right behind her. I thought their names were Lea and Cassie. Something like that. Shaking my head, I grabbed my notebook and headed out into the throng of students.

  During a cl
ass exchange an hour later, I ran into Adam, who fell in step beside me. “There is talk.”

  I arched a brow. Damn. That sounded ominous. “Talk about what? How everyone drives trucks around here? Or how cow tipping really is a pastime? Or how my sister is never, ever going to seriously get with you?”

  Adam sighed. “Talk about Katy, smart-ass.”

  Schooling my features, I stared straight ahead as we navigated the crowded halls. Both of us were a good head or so taller than most. We were like giants in the land of humans.

  “Billy Crump’s in your—”

  “Trig class? Yeah, I know that already.”

  “He was talking in history about you flirting with the new girl,” Adam said, sliding past a group of girls who were openly staring at us. “Ash overheard him.”

  With each passing second, my annoyance was hitting an all-new high.

  “I know you and Ash aren’t seeing each other anymore.”

  “Yep.” I grit my teeth.

  “But you know how she gets,” Adam continued quickly. “You better be careful with your little human—”

  I stopped in the middle of the hall, two seconds from throwing Adam through a wall. Kids shuffled around us as I spoke barely above a whisper. “She’s not my little human.”

  Adam’s gaze was unflinching. “Fine. Whatever. Out of everyone, I don’t care if you took her into the locker room and did her, but she’s glowing…and so are your eyes,” he added, voice low. “And all of this is familiar.”

  Shit. On. A. Brick. My eyes were doing the diamond thing? Great. Glowing eyes were one step away from a Luxen shifting into their true form. Wouldn’t that be fun if I turned into a glowing alien in the middle of a high school hallway? Striving for patience I wasn’t known for, I started walking, leaving Adam behind.

  I needed to get my shit together.

  This back-and-forth crap had to stop. I was beginning to wonder if I had a split personality. Jesus. I needed to stay the hell away from Kat. And that would keep her away from the rest of the Luxen, namely Ash.

  When was the moment Katy became different from the herd—from the rest of the humans? Someone I wanted to know? The day at the lake? When we went for a walk? The night the Arum got a hold of her? Or one of the many times she told me off?

  Shit.

  Adam was right. All of this was familiar, except we’d had this conversation with Dawson over Bethany.

  Dammit. This was not happening.

  I glided through the rest of my classes bored out of my freaking mind. Many times last year, I tried to convince Matthew to get me a forged high school diploma. No such luck there. The DOD probably thought school was a privilege for us, but what they taught couldn’t keep my interest. We learned at an accelerated rate, leaving most humans in the dust. And the DOD would have to approve my request to go to college if that’s what I decided. Hell, I wasn’t even sure I wanted to go to college. I’d rather find a job where I got to work outside—something that didn’t include four small walls.

  When lunch rolled around, I was half tempted to call it a day. School wasn’t the same without Dawson. His exuberance for everything, even the mundane, had been contagious.

  Not hungry, I grabbed a bottle of water and headed to our regular table. I sat beside Ash and leaned back, picking at the label on the bottle.

  “You know,” Ash said, leaning against my arm, “they say what you’re doing is a sign of sexual frustration.”

  I winked at her.

  She grinned and then turned back to her brother. That was the thing about Ash. Even though we’d dated on and off for years, she could be cool…when she wanted to be. Truth was, I think she knew deep down that she really wasn’t that into me either. Not like Dawson and Bethany had felt about each other.

  God, I was thinking a lot about him today.

  He should be here, the first day of our last year. He should’ve been here.

  Lifting my eyes, I immediately found Kat in the lunch line. She was talking to Cassie—no, Carissa—the quieter of the two girls in trig. My gaze dropped down to her flip-flops and slowly worked my way back up.

  I think I loved those jeans. Tight in all the right places.

  It was amazing really—how long Kat’s legs looked for someone so short. I couldn’t figure out why it seemed that way.

  Ash’s hand dropped to my thigh, drawing my attention. Warning bells went off again. She was so up to something. “What?” I asked.

  Her bright eyes fixed on mine. “What are you looking at?”

  “Nothing.” I focused on her, anything to keep her interest off Kat. As feisty as the little kitten was, Kat was absolutely no match for Ash. I set the bottle aside, swinging my legs toward her. “You look nice today.”

  “Don’t I?” Ash beamed. “So do you. But you always look yumtastic.” Glancing over her shoulder, she then turned back and slid into my lap faster than she should have in public.

  A couple of the boys at a neighboring table looked like they would’ve traded in their moms to be in my position.

  “What are you up to?” I kept my hands to myself.

  “Why do you think I’m up to anything?” She pressed her chest against mine, speaking in my ear. “I miss you.”

  I grinned, seeing right through her. “No, you don’t.”

  Pouting, she slapped my shoulder playfully. “Okay. There are some things I miss.”

  About to tell her that I had a good idea of what that thing was, Dee’s jubilant shriek cut me off. “Katy!” she yelled.

  Cursing under my breath, I felt Ash stiffen against me.

  “Sit,” Dee said, smacking the top of the table. “We were talking about—”

  “Wait.” Ash twisted around. I could picture the look on her face. Lips turned down, eyes narrowed. All that equaled bad, bad times. “You did not invite her to sit with us? Really?”

  I focused on the painting of the PHS mascot—a red-and-black Viking, complete with horns. Please don’t sit down.

  “Shut up, Ash,” Adam said. “You’re going to make a scene.”

  “I’m not ‘going to make’ anything happen.” Ash’s arm tightened around my neck like a boa constrictor. “She doesn’t need to sit with us.”

  Dee sighed. “Ash, stop being a bitch. She’s not trying to steal Daemon from you.”

  My eyebrows shot up, but I kept up the prayer. Please don’t sit down. My jaw locked. Please don’t sit here. If she did, Ash would eat her alive out of pure spite. I’d never understand girls. Ash didn’t want me anymore, not really, but holy hell if she’d allow someone else to go there.

  Ash’s body started to vibrate softly. “That’s not what I’m worried about. For real.”

  “Just sit,” Dee said to Katy, her voice tight with exasperation. “She’ll get over it.”

  “Be nice,” I whispered in Ash’s ear, low enough for only her to hear. Ash smacked my arm hard. That’d leave a bruise. I pressed my cheek into her neck. “I mean it.”

  “I’ll do what I want,” she hissed back. And she would, too. Worse than what she was doing now.

  “I don’t know if I should,” Kat said, sounding incredibly small and unsure.

  Every stupid, idiotic thought in my head demanded that I dump Ash out of my lap and get Kat out of here, away from what surely was going to end up being horrible.

  “You shouldn’t,” Ash snapped.

  “Shut up,” Dee said. “I’m sorry I know such hideous bitches.”

  “Are you sure?” Kat asked.

  Ash’s body trembled and heated up. Her skin would be too warm for a human to touch without realizing something was different, wrong even. I could feel her control slipping away. Exposing herself wasn’t likely, but she appeared mad enough to do some damage.

  I turned my head to look at Kat for the first time since I’d seen her in the line. I thought about the conversation on the porch, when she grinned at me. I thought about how she reacted when I’d told her about the legend of Snowbird. And I already knew I was
going to hate myself for what I was about to say, because she