"Old Folks"

Old Folks

  By : Dillon Warren

  Chapter 1

  It was an extremely cold winter evening in Clearwater, FL on November 17, 2006. Florida does not normally have cold winters, but this night was cold far beyond a typical November evening. Walter was just 83 years young this year, and the winters were becoming tougher and tougher on his body each year. This night was particularly tough on him. Normally he would go to sleep, and climb into his nice warm bed well before 8p.m. the rooms at shady oaks retirement home are particularly cozy. The building was an old brick unit built in the early 1900s. It didn’t give the appearance of being comfortable inside, but the staff was very good and caring. They kept the place well maintained. The residents of shady oaks retirement home didn’t have much to complain about. Walter could not go to bed early on this night. Wednesday nights were his time to spend with his lovely wife, Margaret. Margaret was younger than Walter she was 81 years of age. She aged much better than he did however. Margaret still had a blonde tint to her hair. Her face had become wrinkled, but compared to the age in Walters’s face she appeared a good 20 years younger. She was a short woman standing about 5’2 (she was 2 years ago). Walter hadn’t lost any height though. He had always stood an average height of 5’9, and hadn’t lost any of it. He felt he was destined to remain average, but at age 83 the idea of remaining average wasn’t a terrible thought his hair had completely lost its color, he had white hair that was rapidly receding, but had not fully left his yet as if it was hanging onto hope that he would not go bald. He didn’t care though. He had long past the age here his appearance was a concern to him. Once you pass sixty and move into a retirement home the concern for your look tend to go out the window. He was content wearing whatever the orderly picked out for him each day, tonight it blue sweatpants, and a blue jacket with a duck on it. Walter felt this looked childish, but at least it matched. Margaret however looked beautiful as always. Even at this age she took the time to pick out her outfit carefully, do her make-up, hair etc. Walter did not understand this, but he admired it. He did not know how she drew the energy to do such a thing in a place like this, but he appreciated it none the less. Margaret’s appearance was all Walter had to look forward to in this place. This was the highlight of his life ever since he hit the ripe old age of 79. A few times a week he would pull up a seat in the cafeteria, and order his usually banana pudding and oatmeal. The banana’s were freshly slices, and mixed in the pudding. He would also have a nice warm bowl of oatmeal with apple cinnamon, with a glass of chocolate milk. He would get hot chocolate on a night so cold like this. The food at shady oaks was top notch as well. Again there really wasn’t much for the residents to complain about. The place was designed for comfort. He would then read the daily paper. He would get it first thing in the morning, but he would wait to read it. He wouldn’t have anybody to converse with, so he needed something to help work his mind while he ate. The Buccaneers had started to become a relevant team, but always seemed to disappoint. Walter loved football, and always made sure to read the sports first in case he ran out of time. He would make sure he arrived at 7:55, this was precisely 5 minutes before Margaret would arrive each night. He made sure he got there before she did, each of them was always punctual. This is one thing he truly loved about her. He made sure that he would grab the southernmost seat in the cafeteria. This was because she sat in the northern end of the cafeteria to be close to the overview of the golf course. Shady oaks had the largest, and most beautiful golf course of any retirement home in Florida, and Margaret loved the view. She ate dinner in this spot every night. Walter would watch her from a far every night during dinner. He did not keep distance out of want, or because he did not want to be right by her side. He had a deep undying love for his wife. He yearned to be next to her every moment until his inevitable passing would come. This was the closest he was able to get, and he had accepted it. He realized that if he couldn’t be right by her side, he at least wanted to be able to see her, and know she was happy, and well. He knew that she loved him. He had never questioned it. She had been an amazing wife to him, and he never felt more loved by any one, or anything in his long eventful life. He wished so much that he could sit at her table with her, and tell her that he loved her. All he wanted was to be able to hold his wife, and tell her every day that she meant the world to him. He was instead forced to simply watch from a distance, and hope somewhere deep down, she knew he was there, caring for her after all these years. He was not distant from her by choice, he had been forced into this role. He had fought it for years, but eventually you must give in when you know there is a battle that you cannot win. Five years prior, Margaret had been diagnosed with Alzheimer’s disease. It has been a long rough battle from there. She was able to fight it for a while. She remembered Walter for a whole two years after the diagnosis, but it went downhill from there. While she could still function entirely, and lead a relatively healthy/happy life, she had no memory of her life before this place. Walter and her had come here together 13 years ago. They decided not to be a burden on their family members, and check themselves into the retirement home, before they caused too much stress. It wasn’t bad at all though, because they had each other. They shared a room, and lived as just as happily together as they had outside this place. Shady Oaks was very nice, and filled with nice people so there was really no need to complain. Everything was going as well as it could for a couple in their 70’s living in a retirement home. They were both the types that always saw the good in things, and enjoyed life. They always had been. This was until Margaret became sick. Walter had always seen the good in even the toughest things in his life. His step-father had been extremely abusive to him as a child. He had been beaten, and even hospitalized regularly because of it. But as he got older Walter had seen how this shaped his character, and mad him a better person. He could not find the good behind this. He could not imagine why such a wonderful woman had to have this happen to her. He felt he would have been much more deserving of this illness. He had been a bit of a troublemaker in his earlier years. Not Margaret though, she had always been the sweetest most loving person Walter had ever met. He felt she deserved the best, and decided that was what she would get. For all 45 years of their marriage he treated her like a queen. He held every door for her, cooked for her, and held her every night. He made sure he treated her the way she deserved. That was his biggest resentment over the distance he now had to keep. It was not that he couldn’t see her. That would be selfish reasoning of him. It was because he could not treat her the way he had for so many years, the way he knew that she deserved. He knew why he had to stay away from her thought, and while it tore him apart inside, he knew it was what was best for her. There had been multiple instances in the past that needed to be averted in the future. Margaret’s illness had mad Walter very bitter, and hateful inside. He would get mad at her for not remembering him. This was not because he felt she did it on purpose, he knew it was the disease, but because he knew that she needed him, and he could not be there for her if she didn’t remember him. There had been many nights that they had gotten into arguments over it. It was not fair to Margaret, because her memory was gone, and there was nothing she was doing wrong. Walter would yell, but it was not his anger towards her, it was this situation, and this damn disease. But he still yelled, and became angry. It not only affected their relationship, but it affected how the entire home looked at Walter. He could tell they thought he was a bad person for yelling at her, and for becoming angry, but Walter didn’t care.” What right did they have to judge him anyway “he thought, they would handle his situation just the same. The yelling was not forced Walter completely away though. It was an inc
ident only the guards were able to tell Walter about, because he himself could not remember it. He did not know if this was because he was losing his memory as well, or if he just decided to block it out of his mind because he did not want to remember. The guards told Walter that a night similar to his, almost a year ago exactly Walter was yelling at Margaret in frustration. This was not out of the usual. What happened next Walter refuses to admit to this day, even though he has accepted the results. He only has because he is the only person who does not think it happened, this must mean he is wrong. Walter had told Margaret that she must remember him, she had too. She told him that he was not her husband, and never had been, that he was nothing, and was not any part of her life. The guards told Walter that he had struck her. He hit her so hard that it broke his own hand (this may have been because he was old, and fragile). She was hospitalized for a few days, but was released after. He was not allowed in the same room with her for months after the incident. Only within the last 3 months had Walter been allowed to sit in the cafeteria, and watch her from a far. She did not remember the incident so it didn’t bother her. She didn’t even know who Walter was. A guard would sit at the table next to Walter, and make sure an incident like before did not happen. He was not quick enough to make it across the cafeteria faster than the guard even if he wanted too. But he knew better. He knew that him keeping space was best for her. If he had truly done what they said, he knew he had to treat her like his queen, and keep his distance, even if it went against everything he wanted. Walter was not a selfish man at all. Everything was ok though, while this was not the way he had thought things would play out, he was thankful that he was still able to see her. Walter had seen far more tragic things happen to couples who had been consumed by things in this place. As wonderful a place that Shady Oaks was, the terrible things that happened this place could not be avoided. Many other couples at this age had already been separated from their loved ones (one way or another), many could not walk/eat/ or poop on their own. So relatively speaking Walter felt that he and Margaret were doing pretty well. Even though her memories were going, Margaret’s body was healthy as could be. She was still much more spry and full of life than Walter had become. She still always had a smile on her face, and a perk in her step. Walter knew as long as she was happy, and in relatively good health, that was what was important, and he needed to do whatever he could to preserve that. Right now sitting, and loving her from a distance the best thing he could do for her, though he hated it so. Walter was extremely tired on this particular night, but he would not dare go to sleep early on a night he could see his wife. On a night like this Walter normally may have gone to sleep around 5 p.m., he knew he had to tough it out though. He didn’t have anywhere he needed to be, so he could sleep until his heart’s content, losing a little rest was well worth it. All he could think about was how beautiful she looked this evening. She had on a beautiful red dress. She had maintained an amazing figure through the year, unlike Walter, who had begun to grow a belly. He didn’t mind though, he no longer had anybody to attract. He actually like the idea of the freedom to become fat and lazy in old age. In his younger years Walter would obsess about exercising and eating right for health reasons, and to impress his wife. These days he was able to be care free about his weight. He did not have the need, nor the energy, to put in the time to stay in shape. It was not a huge deal, the only woman he wanted to impress did not remember him, and the negative side effects of his food could not ruin him before his time with fate would come anyway so there was no reason to worry. Walter always got his food before Margaret so that he could watch her the entire time she was there. He didn’t want to waste even a moment standing in line when he could be spending time with his wife. Margaret was returning from the food line when Walter noticed the first thing that would strike him as different about tonight. Margaret decided to get the pudding, and meatloaf. Now to most this may seem the most ordinary of occurrences. To Walter this was a huge event. Before the incident that forced Water to the other side of the room, she had always gotten the meatloaf and pudding. Walter had noticed that ever since he has been observing her dinners from a far, she had not ordered either of these items, until just now. Why the change he wondered? Maybe a lingering memory, or possibly that it did look exceptionally delicious tonight. In any case Walter took notice. He also realized that she had today’s newspaper, and began to go to work on the crossword puzzle as she ate. This too was a first since the incident. Was it coincidence that she decided to change these two things tonight? Walter had become so accustomed to her routine that any subtle change sparked extreme curiosity. But why tonight? It must just be coincidence. But what are the chances she would change her routine back to the way it was before the incident, especially on their anniversary? Could it be coincidence? Walter new it must be. With Margaret’s deteriorating memory, and health there was no way she could actually remember the significance of tonight. As much as Walter wanted to believe this was so he knew it was impossible. He knew his mind was only telling him what he wanted, and that she simply had a random impulse to do these things. Just when Walter had that thought, he heard it. It was like the air was sucked out of the room as if he were in a vacuum. The room fell completely silent except for one sound. Walter could not breathe, he was frozen in place and could do nothing but listen to the smooth melody coming from his wife’s lips. There was just no way could he be hearing this, his senses must be deceiving him. He had to concentrate to make sure, but this was real. Margaret had begun humming “I fall to Pieces”, their wedding song. Walter’s mind raced like it hadn’t in the last 40 years. He did not know his mind was capable of this quick complex thought anymore. Why was this happening? How could she know to do all of these things on this night? If she had remembered the day, or the importance, why did she not even take notice to her husband sitting directly across from her in plain sight? Did she remember her wedding, but just forget Walter’s face? Or was this all the cruelest coincidence to ever occur? Walter knew at this moment he needed to answer these questions. He knew he was separated from her for her safety, and did not want to jeopardize that in any way. He knew he had to speak to her. He had to answer these questions. And if he could jog her memory, and cause her to remember him, he could care for her, and greatly improve her life. He had to risk it. He couldn’t do it now, not here in front of the guards, and the rest of the community. He had to think of something. He needed to get to Margaret, and speak with her. “ I can fix all of this” He thought, but how.