Delusion

DELUSION

  A Short Story in the Slice of Life Series

  David Lee Howells

  Copyright 2013

  [“I am Mariel. Praise to the One who sent me to this place. I have come to give you peace and comfort, Shawn Browning. Your time in this existence has come to a close, and you have suffered greatly. Let go of the trivial things. Let go of memories that would have passed upon your inevitable demise. Walk toward the light and be embraced. You are leaving. You are gone.”]

  January 2nd, 2017. Initial log for Senior Project for Psycho-social Advanced class. Mary Taylor and Jeremy LaHoda co-authors. Topic: severe mental trauma due to accidental prolonged exposure to sensory deprivation.

  Mary: Person to be studied will be referred to as ‘Subject’ until privacy rights can be researched. Subject, according to reports from AP, Reuters and Huffington Post (bibliography entries 1-3) had built a sensory deprivation chamber, reasons unknown. The system, according to a spokesperson for Oceanic Bliss Floatation Company, when properly installed, allowed a maximum of one hour exposure, but recommended 20 minutes maximum for beginners. There are failsafes that automatically open the chamber cover should there be damage to the device or a power failure. A motor vehicle accident nearby damaged a transformer and shut down electrical power to the region for sixteen hours. Tech reps for Oceanic report faulty installation and failure to follow instructions. Subject was discovered two days later by local police and rescue personnel upon request by Subject’s concerned sister, who lives in Southern United States. The rescue of Subject occurred on March 17th, 2016.

  Jeremy: Professor Jayne Alistair has given us free will to set the goals of our investigation. She brought to our attention an article in the Journal of the American Psychiatric Association dated May 7th of last year about this event, authors Kant, Jacobsma and Perry (bibliography entry 4). The article reviewed the initial diagnosis of Subject as ‘sensory isolation deprivation syndrome’. By next week, I will research this diagnosis, which covers a very wide umbrella of circumstances. The article went further to state that Subject has been conversant, and appears to suffer hallucinations, altered mental status, and grandiose delusions. Subject feels he is a celestial being. They state that Subject was evasive on specifics on his new persona, leaning more in discourse to philosophical beliefs.

  [“Bless the One who has given me so much time and opportunity to learn from these most curious beings. They wish simple peace, yet hide its easy access with needless and destructive complexities and faulty perceptions. Here in the place, the One has caused to be gathered in one place those who need my help more than any. How thoughtful and clever. So great is the need of so many. I am grateful.”]

  January 9th, 2017. Second entry.

  Mary: Here is an overview of sensory deprivation chambers. While an enclosed room deprived of light or sound may be such a chamber, the more common conception and what was used by Subject is a flotation chamber. This allows a subject to float in a body-temperature buoyant solution to allow the body to float balanced in suspension. A danger for someone in such isolation is to misinterpret what little feedback they receive into hallucinatory perceptions. See 2003 issue of Journal of Nervous and Mental Disease for topic ‘faulty source monitoring’. See 197 (10), pages 783-785. Bibliography entry 5.

  Jeremy: Sensory Deprivation Syndrome covers many techniques (including something as simple as a blindfold). This approach can have both negative and positive outcomes. Deprivation has been used as an interrogation method. Yet, when used carefully, can increase the success of alcohol and cigarette treatment outcomes. See bibliography reference entries 6 and 7 from Neurobehavioural Health and Canadian Psychology.

  Sensory deprivation of periods as short as 15 minutes have, in some subjects, resulted in depression and hallucinations. Studies show that risk of ill effects varies greatly in the human population.

  Our University’s legal counsel, Samuel Simonofski, says we may now use the actual name of Subject in our reports since all information to date and likely in the future derives from sources available to the general public. The name of Subject is Mr. Shawn Browning, though Mr. Browning has different ideas on his personal ID. According to Huffington Post News in yesterday’s national headline edition, Mr. Browning feels he should be addressed as Mariel. Note that ‘el’ at the end of the name of a celestial being is a typical Judeo-Christian tradition regarding the names of Angels, as the ending ‘el’ means ‘of God’.

  [“Dear Child, yes, you are responsible for the death of your brother in that terrible fire. Did you know you are also responsible for a young girl who even now is stepping off of a very high bridge and will not survive? You are at fault for neither calamity. Your being responsible reflects your connection to all your kind. This means you are also responsible for a healthy baby boy being born even as we speak. Whether you grieve or rejoice, it is all to celebrate your wonderful self. Go. Share and grow, be at peace. I am Mariel.”]

  January 16th, 2017. Third entry.

  Mary: I am pleased to have had an e mail response from the sister to Mr. Browning. I found her on Facebook and, apologizing for intruding on someone who likely has had all too much privacy invasion, stated that my partner and I were pursuing her brother’s situation in a non-sensationalist senior thesis. Patricia Browning agreed to a telephone interview, as long as we keep it brief, and that we allow her the right to decline any question. I will discuss with Professor Alistair on making a list of appropriate questions. My partner will participate, and Professor Alistair will be a silent witness to the interview. This is scheduled to take place tomorrow night, Thursday, the 17th, at 7:30 Central Time.

  Jeremy: In preparation for our conversation with Ms. Browning, I’ve gathered as much information as possible from mass media sources via the internet. I note that there is a lot of variation of ‘the facts’ of the case, while there is also general consensus on other aspects.

  Most sources say Mr. Browning experienced deprivation far in excess of what even interrogation limitations allow. At least dehydration wasn’t an issue as there was an on-demand water source in the tank by a flexible straw. Mr. Browning underwent colonic cleansing before his deprivation effort, so fecal contamination of the chamber’s reservoir was minimized. Urinary contamination was certainly present, but extremely diluted by the chamber’s reservoir. Mr. Browning was initially uncommunicative, whether by shock, altered mental status or by choice. He was able to focus on a direction of noise, respond to pain stimuli, and had essentially normal results in blood work, EEG, EKG, MRI and palpation examination. He is now able to eat, but refuses any meat product, though he does accept eggs. Otherwise, Mr. Browning prefers a vegetarian diet. It was after a four day initial silence that he began to give mostly one-word responses, and announced his name as being Mariel.

  Variations on this topic are mostly subjective opinions regarding Mr. Browning’s state of mind. These include opinions of him being irreparably insane, reparably insane, spiritually enlightened, demon possessed, and being able to channel angelic presence. I saw two supermarket tabloids (Enquirer and Star, last week’s editions), mention the possibilities of channeling Elvis or being taken over by an alien from another dimension where intelligent life was aquatic based, given the medium Mr. Browning was immersed in at the time.

  [“How wonderful of you to want to help me become more self aware. Might I suggest though that your sterling ambitions might be put to better use focused on these poor broken humans? You see, I am fully self aware already. You are, how you say... ‘preaching to the choir.’ Bless you, Doctor.”]

  January 17th, 2013. The following is a transcript of the interview with Ms. Patricia Browning. My partner and professor agreed I would lead t
he interview, given that I initiated contact in the first place. The conversation was recorded and later transcribed as is seen below. ‘Patty’ indicates Ms. Browning, as by her request. The interviewee speaks with a Southern dialect. We have tried to represent her idioms faithfully.

  Mary - Thank you Ms. Browning for letting us talk to you. My partner and I understand your requirements and will abide by them. Our Professor is listening in, but will not contribute. She wants to make sure we are following protocols for fairness and accuracy. Is there something you would like to say to begin our talk with?

  Patty - I must say you sound awfully grown up for a student, far more than some of those other supposed professionals that have contacted me. Y’all go ahead and ask your questions, dear. Oh, and call me Patty, please. Mind if I call you Mary?

  Mary - That’s fine with me. Thank you. You have been in contact with your brother. Can you give us your impression of his state of mind?

  Patty - Shawn is bricks short of a load, if that’s what you mean. My brother was always the egg head of the family. Did all that yoga, meditating, taking courses in things that are supposed to expand your spiritual awareness. That’s what that stupid tank thing was probably all about. We didn’t even know he built the thing until the police told us about it later. Anyway, he thinks he’s someone called Mah Ree Ell, who took over and gave Shawn the royal boot. He either pretends he don’t know me or his other kin, or he’s got amnesia or something. Other than that, Shawn’s right fine. Eats just as much as he used to, just no meat. Says it makes him sick. That’s a big change, I’ll say. My brother used to be the main cook at family barbeques. Darned good one, I’ll add. Sure gonna miss the way he did ribs. Oh, crazy something. Shawn sounds different, like he lost his Southern talk. I never knowed him to do imitations, but he sure sounds like a Yank now.

  Mary - Patty, you say he acts like he doesn’t know you. But you still talk with him. Where is he currently...residing? And what kind of care is he receiving?

  Patty - Shawn is taken up residence at the loony bin, dear. He’s in the low security section of the psych ward of Bellaire Medical Center. Got his own room because he keeps spooking out anyone who tries to share his room. Ain’t that a hoot? Shawn scares away crazy people. Go figure. He don’t take no medications since he sleeps fine, communicates real friendly like, and he’s completely even tempered.

  Mary - Patty, you said he ‘scared away’ other patients in the psych ward. How does he do that? Sounds like he’s not very threatening.

  Patty - Honey, he uses the most frightening thing on this side of God’s green earth. Shawn tells the truth. He weren’t the most honest egg in the crate before this whole thing happened, but he weren’t a rotten egg either. Shawn was kind of normal, if you got over his fascination with spiritual expansion and all that. For a sister to say her brother was even near normal, well dear, you can take that to the bank.

  I’ll give you a for instance. One patient there thought he was Napoleon. One of the shrink-doctors there said Napoleon is the most common fantasy that nutty people have about themselves. Go figure. I prefer Robert E or Sam Houston. So, this Napoleon feller comes up to Shawn and talks in French. What does Shawn do? Talks French right back at him. Doc said that ten minutes later, the nut didn’t want to be Napoleon any more...switched to Joan of Arc, and now is arguing about which bathroom he gets to use. Doc said it was progress, and asked me when Shawn learned French? Well, we all know some Cajun words, but not enough to talk it. I have no idea when my brother learned it. Maybe one of those language immersion programs, since immersion seems to be his thing. After all, we was raised Baptist.

  (Mary needed to regroup, indicated Jeremy to step in)

  Jeremy - Patty, if I may call you that, I’m Jeremy, Mary’s partner. Mind if I ask a thing or two?

  Patty - Well now, don’t you sound all polite and smart? You and Mary sound like you make a nice couple. You’re right respectful too to let a woman lead the conversation. Smart boy. I think you’ll go places. Go ahead.

  Jeremy - Yes. Well. Where was I?

  Patty - Well, Honey, if you don’t know, I certainly can’t help you.

  Jeremy - Please tell me we can edit this. Anyway, that sounds like your brother had experienced something like ‘talking in tongues’. I’ve read where people who have had either head trauma, or fasted and saw visions, or even had a religious revelation, might either talk in an alien language or even a known language that he or she never spoke before. Has he done anything else along these lines?

  Patty - Well, he ain’t walked on any water that I know of, but I don’t peek when he takes a bath, either. What I can tell you is this, and you can ask the shrinks there with my full permission. They been having a lot of long term nut cases suddenly make a whole lot of improvement after they talk to Shawn. The Shawn we all knowed couldn’t have talked himself out of a wet paper bag of trouble, and any advice he gave to someone who asked was more likely to get the asker in deeper trouble than he already was in. Now, all of a sudden, he’s the Moses of the Mad Hatters.

  Now I ain’t saying that Shawn is the Jesus the Jews have been waiting for the past couple thousand years. But maybe there’s something real that is changed in him. Good Lord is still around, and still doing miracles for thems what has eyes to see and ears to hear. Sure, go ahead and analyze him with science. I got no problem with that. But maybe someone ought to look at him from the possibility that there really IS something holy that happened in that tank. At least cover all the bases.

  Jeremy - Patty, what you just said honestly hadn’t occurred to me, or to Mary I think. Mary? (May indicated with shaking her head no.). Yes, I’ll add that to our goal list. It’s also the least I can do in gratitude for your time and effort.

  Patty - Mary, Jeremy sounds like a keeper. If you ain’t gonna get your hooks into him, you let me know. I got a real cute niece that needs a better boyfriend than that toad wart she’s dating. Jeremy, if I’m on the mark, then Mary’s cheeks ought to be a pretty red right now.

  Jeremy - (response partially deleted as deemed not germane to the topic and an invasion of privacy to the indicated researcher). Patty, is there something that you want my partner Mary to focus on, um, besides what you talked about a minute ago?

  Patty - Mary, I’d like you two to get guidance from honest to God holy folk. Never mind Popes and Cardinals and such. You go to religious leaders who got a mind to get off the pulpit and in the trenches against the Prince of Darkness. Find ministers with dirt under their fingernails instead of sportin manicures. A real holy man will shake your hand like he means it. Just ‘cause Jesus was represented by a fish don’t mean that should be what the secret handshake should feel like. Get me?

  Mary - Patty, you have my word of honor. It’s another great idea you gave us, and our Professor is smiling and nodding her approval. I think she regrets not being involved in the conversation. You know, I think you two might have a lot in common.

  Patty - Well Sakes! Give her my phone number and we’ll girl chat later. OK, I gotta split soon. My husband Ambrose will be coming home soon from his truck run. Dinner don’t make itself even WITH a microwave. Anything else you want to know?

  Mary - One last thing, Patty. This could be a huge topic, but answer as you can and have time for. What was Shawn like as a young boy?

  Patty - Little Shawn? He was your typical brother, dear. A pain in the kiester. Gotta go. Call again if you need.

  End transcription.

  [“Thank all of you for being here and sharing with me. Look out this window, see the sunlight, the trees bare of leaves who will soon be reborn in green life. Let your minds and imaginations wonder and wander here, and forsake that hypnotic false dream machine. Look at those poor souls over there, lulled into a world of false images of engineered and faked passion. Only within yourselves is found what is real and lasting and truly fulfilling. Be the tree
, find your sun and warmth, and blossom once again.”]

  January 23rd, 2017.

  Mary: Thanks to the recommendations of the patient’s closest relative, Patricia Browning, and with gratitude to our Professor and the Dean of the college for cutting red tape for us, Jeremy and I now have an appointment this Saturday to meet directly with Mr. Shawn Browning. Our college has been gracious enough to provide my partner and myself with airfare, and is willing to defray our travel, hotel, and eating costs with the understanding that this project will have its results refined and brought to journal caliber. This is very exciting.

  My partner is currently making connections with representatives of different theologies. My focus has been to affirm all the arrangements for our interview in three days. The hotel is within walking distance to the Medical Center, and they were kind enough to allow us vouchers for two meals in their cafeteria. Our Professor tells us that academia has many times been supplement limited budgets as opportunity allows, and that this is also a part of our education.

  I contacted the head of the Bellaire Medical Center’s Psychiatric Unit, Dr. Hamud Shaktrin. The conversation was not recorded, but here are the main points I recorded free-hand.

  We must resign ourselves to addressing Mr. Browning as Mariel, if we are to expect any conversation at all.

  Despite the peaceful nature of Mr. Browning to date, we are not to be alone with him at any time during the interview. There must always be a clear line of sight with one of the staff of the Center and the patient.

  There may be some other security issues we will have to coordinate with. There are those who hope Mr. Browning has the healing power of Jesus the Christ, and the Medical Center has started to become a Mecca of sorts for people with various maladies, the list of which sounded reasonably biblical.

  While not encouraged to talk with other residents, Dr. Shaktrin understands that it may behoove us to have a supervised exposure to some patients who have had productive interaction with Mr. Browning.