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PS, I Love You

Cecelia Ahern


  Sharon began to laugh. “Oh good, because I was beginning to worry there for a second.”

  “Sharon, you are always so supportive you make me sick sometimes!” Holly exclaimed. “Now this is what else was inside.” She handed them the crumpled page that was torn from the brochure.

  She watched with amusement as the girls tried to figure out Gerry’s writing and Denise finally held her hand up to her mouth. “Oh my God!” she gasped, sitting forward on her seat.

  “What what what?” Sharon demanded and leaned forward with excitement. “Did Gerry buy you a holiday?”

  “No.” Holly shook her head seriously.

  “Oh.” Sharon and Denise both sat back in their seats with disappointment.

  She allowed an uncomfortable silence to gather between them before she spoke again.

  “Girls,” she said with a smile beginning to spread across her face, “he bought us a holiday!”

  The girls opened a bottle of wine.

  “Oh, this is incredible,” Denise said after the news had sunk in. “Gerry’s such a sweetie.”

  Holly nodded, feeling proud of her husband, who had once again managed to surprise them all.

  “So you went down to this Barbara person?” Sharon asked.

  “Yes, and she was the sweetest girl,” Holly smiled. “She sat with me for ages, telling me about the conversation they had that day.”

  “That was nice.” Denise sipped her wine. “When was it by the way?”

  “He went in at the end of November.”

  “November?” Sharon looked thoughtful. “That was after the second operation.”

  Holly nodded. “The girl said he was pretty weak when he went in.”

  “Isn’t it funny that none of us had any idea at all?” Sharon said, still astonished by the whole thing.

  They all nodded silently.

  “Well, it looks like we’re all off to Lanzarote!” Denise cheered and she held her glass up. “To Gerry!”

  “To Gerry!” Holly and Sharon joined in.

  “Are you sure Tom and John won’t mind?” Holly asked, suddenly aware that the girls had partners to think of.

  “Of course John won’t mind!” Sharon laughed. “He’ll probably be delighted to be rid of me for a week!”

  “Yeah, and me and Tom can go away for a week another time, which actually suits me fine,” agreed Denise. “Because that way we’re not stuck together for two weeks on our first holiday together!” she laughed.

  “Sure you two practically live together anyway!” Sharon said, nudging her.

  Denise gave a quick smile but didn’t answer and the two of them dropped the subject. That annoyed Holly, because they were always doing that. She wanted to hear how her friends were getting on in their relationships but nobody seemed to tell her any of the juicy gossip out of fear of hurting her. People seemed to be afraid to tell her about how happy they were or about the good news in their lives. Then again they also refused to moan about the bad things. So instead of being informed of what was really going on in her friends’ lives she was stuck with this mediocre chitchat about … nothing, really, and it was starting to bother her. She couldn’t be shielded from other people’s happiness forever, what good would that do her?

  “I have to say that leprechaun really is doing a great job on your garden, Holly,” Denise cut into her thoughts as she looked out the window.

  Holly blushed. “Oh I know. I’m sorry for being a bitch earlier, Denise,” she apologized. “I suppose I should really go next door and thank him properly.”

  After Denise and Sharon had headed off home Holly grabbed a bottle of wine from under the stairs and carried it next door to her neighbor. She rang the bell and waited.

  “Hi Holly,” Derek said, opening the door. “Come in, come in.”

  Holly looked past him and into the kitchen and saw the family sitting around the table eating dinner. She backed away from the door slightly.

  “No, I won’t disturb you, I just came by to give you this”—she handed him the bottle of wine—“as a token of my thanks.”

  “Well Holly, this is really thoughtful of you,” he said, reading the label. Then he looked up with a confused expression on his face. “But thanks for what, if you don’t mind me asking?”

  “Oh, for tidying up my garden,” she said, blushing. “I’m sure the entire estate was cursing me for ruining the appearance of the street,” she laughed.

  “Holly, your garden certainly isn’t a worry to anyone, we all understand, but I haven’t been tidying it for you, I’m sorry to say.”

  “Oh.” Holly cleared her throat, feeling very embarrassed. “I thought you had been.”

  “No, no.” He shook his head.

  “Well, you wouldn’t by any chance know who has been?” she laughed like an idiot.

  “No, I have no idea,” he said, looking very confused. “I thought it was you, to be honest. How odd.”

  Holly wasn’t quite sure what to say next.

  “So perhaps you would like to take this back,” he said awkwardly, thrusting the wine bottle toward her.

  “Oh no, that’s OK,” she laughed again, “you can keep that as thanks for … not being neighbors from hell. Anyway, I’ll let you get back to dinner.” She ran off down the driveway with her face burning with embarrassment. What kind of fool wouldn’t know who was tidying her own garden?

  She knocked on a few more doors around the estate and to her continued embarrassment nobody seemed to know what she was talking about. Everyone seemed to have jobs and lives, and remarkably enough they didn’t spend their days monitoring her garden. She returned to her house even more confused. As she walked in the door the phone was ringing and she ran to answer it.

  “Hello?” she panted.

  “What were you doing, running a marathon?”

  “No, I was chasing leprechauns,” Holly explained.

  “Oh, cool.”

  The oddest thing was that Ciara didn’t even question her.

  “It’s my birthday in two weeks.”

  Holly had completely forgotten. “Yeah, I know,” she said matter-of-factly.

  “Well, Mum and Dad want us all to go out for a family dinner …”

  Holly groaned loudly.

  “Exactly,” and she screamed away from the phone, “Dad, Holly said the same thing as me.”

  Holly giggled as she heard her father cursing and grumbling in the background.

  Ciara returned to the phone and spoke loudly so her father could hear, “OK, so my idea is to go ahead with the family dinner but to invite friends as well so that it can actually be an enjoyable night. What do you think?”

  “Sounds good,” Holly agreed.

  Ciara screamed away from the phone, “Dad, Holly agrees with my idea.”

  “That’s all very well,” Holly heard her dad yelling, “but I’m not paying for all those people to eat.”

  “He has a point.” Holly added, “Tell you what, why don’t we have a barbecue? That way Dad can be in his element and it won’t be so expensive.”

  “Hey, that’s a cool idea!” Ciara screamed away from the phone once again, “Dad, what about having a barbecue?”

  There was a silence.

  “He’s loving that idea,” Ciara giggled. “Mr. Super Chef will once again cook for the masses.”

  Holly also giggled at the thought. Her dad got so excited when they had barbecues; he took the whole thing so seriously and stood by the barbecue constantly while watching over his wonderful creations. Gerry had been like that too. What was it with men and barbecues? Probably it was the only thing that the two of them could actually cook, either that or they were closet pyro-maniacs.

  “OK, so will you tell Sharon and John, Denise and her DJ bloke, and will you ask that Daniel guy to come too? He’s yummy!” she laughed hysterically.

  “Ciara, I hardly know the guy. Ask Declan to ask him, he sees him all the time.”

  “No, because I want you to subtly tell him that I love hi
m and want to have his babies. Somehow I don’t think Declan would feel very comfortable doing that.”

  Holly groaned.

  “Stop it!” Ciara gave out, “He’s my birthday treat!”

  “OK,” she gave in, “but why do you want all my friends there, what about your friends?”

  “Holly, I’ve lost contact with all my friends, I’ve been away for so long. And all my other friends are in Australia and the stupid bastards haven’t bothered to call me,” she huffed.

  Holly knew to whom she was referring. “But don’t you think this would be a great opportunity to catch up with your old friends? You know, invite them to a barbecue; it’s a nice, relaxed atmosphere.”

  “Yeah right, what would I have to tell them when they start asking questions? Have you a job? Eh … no. Have you a boyfriend? Eh … no. Where do you live? Eh … actually I still live with my parents. How pathetic would I sound?”

  Holly gave up. “OK, whatever … anyway, I’ll call the others and …”

  Ciara had already hung up.

  Holly decided to get the most awkward phone call out of the way first and she dialed the number to Hogan’s.

  “Hello, Hogan’s.”

  “Hi, can I speak to Daniel Connelly, please?”

  “Yeah, hold on.” She was put on hold and “Greensleeves” belted out into her ear.

  “Hello?”

  “Hi, Daniel?”

  “Yeah, who’s this?”

  “It’s Holly Kennedy.” She danced nervously around her bedroom, hoping he would recognize the name.

  “Who?” he yelled as the noise in the background became louder.

  Holly dived onto her bed in embarrassment. “It’s Holly Kennedy? Declan’s sister?”

  “Oh Holly, hiya, hold on a second while I go somewhere quieter.”

  Holly was stuck listening to “Greensleeves” again and she danced around her bedroom and started singing along.

  “Sorry Holly,” Daniel said, picking up the phone again and laughing. “You like ‘Greensleeves’?”

  Holly’s face went scarlet and she hit herself across the head. “Em, no, not really.” She couldn’t think of what else to say, then she remembered why she was ringing.

  “I was just ringing to invite you to a barbecue.”

  “Oh great, yeah, I would love to go.”

  “It’s Ciara’s birthday on Friday week; you know my sister, Ciara?”

  “Eh … yes, the one with the pink hair.”

  Holly laughed. “Yeah, stupid question, everyone knows Ciara. Well, she wanted me to invite you to the barbecue and to subtly tell you that she wants to marry you and have your babies.”

  Daniel started laughing. “Yes … that was very subtle all right.”

  Holly wondered whether he was interested in her sister, if she was his type.

  “She’s twenty-five on Friday week,” Holly felt like adding for some unknown reason.

  “Oh … right.”

  “Em, well, Denise and your friend Tom are coming as well, and Declan will be there with his band of course, so you’ll know plenty of people.”

  “Are you going?”

  “Of course!”

  “Good, I’ll know even more people then, won’t I?” he laughed.

  “Oh great, she’ll be delighted you’re coming.”

  “Well, I would feel rude for not accepting an invitation from a princess.”

  At first Holly thought he was flirting and then she realized he was referring to the documentary, so she mumbled some sort of incoherent answer. He was just about to hang the phone up when a thought suddenly popped into her head, “Oh, there’s just one more thing.”

  “Go for it,” he said.

  “Is that position behind the bar still available?”

  Twenty-five

  THANK GOD IT WAS A BEAUTIFUL day, Holly thought, as she locked her car and walked around to the back of her parents’ house. The weather had drastically changed that week and it had rained and rained continuously. Ciara was in hysterics about what would become of her barbecue and she had been hell to be with all week. Luckily for everyone’s sake the weather had returned to its former splendor. Holly already had a good tan from lying out in the sun all month, one of the perks of not having a job, and she felt like showing it off today by wearing a cute little denim skirt she had bought in the summer sales and a simple tight white T-shirt that made her look even browner.

  Holly was proud of the present she had bought Ciara and she knew Ciara would love it. It was a butterfly belly button ring that had a little pink crystal in each wing. She had chosen it so it would coordinate with Ciara’s new butterfly tattoo and her pink hair, of course. She followed the sounds of laughter and was glad to see that the garden was full with family and friends. Denise had already arrived with Tom and Daniel, and they had all flaked out on the grass. Sharon had arrived without John and she was sitting chatting to Holly’s mum, no doubt discussing Holly’s progress in life. Well, she was out of the house, wasn’t she? That was a miracle in itself.

  Holly frowned as she noted Jack was once again not present. Ever since he had helped her carry out the task of cleaning out Gerry’s wardrobe, he had been unusually distant. Even when they were children Jack had always been great at understanding Holly’s needs and feelings without her having to point them out to him, but when she had told him that she needed space after Gerry’s death, she didn’t mean she wanted to be completely ignored and isolated. It was so out of character for him not to be in contact for so long. Nerves fluttered through Holly’s stomach and she prayed that he was all right.

  Ciara was standing in the middle of the garden screaming at everyone and loving being the center of attention. She was dressed in a pink bikini top to match her pink hair and blue denim cutoffs.

  Holly approached her with her present, which was immediately grabbed from her hand and ripped open. She needn’t have bothered wrapping it so neatly.

  “Oh Holly, I love it!” Ciara exclaimed and threw her arms around her sister.

  “I thought you would,” Holly said, glad she had chosen the right thing, because otherwise her beloved sister would no doubt have let her know about it.

  “I’m gonna wear it now actually,” Ciara said, ripping out her current belly button ring and piercing the butterfly through her skin.

  “Ugh,” Holly shuddered. “I could have gone without seeing that, thank you very much.”

  There was a beautiful smell of barbecued food in the air and Holly’s mouth began to water. She wasn’t surprised to see all the men huddled around the barbecue with her dad in pride of place. Hunter men must provide food for women.

  Holly spotted Richard and she marched over. Ignoring the small talk she just charged right in. “Richard, did you tidy my garden?”

  Richard looked up from the barbecue with a confused expression on his face. “Excuse me, did I what?” The rest of the men stopped their conversation and stared.

  “Did you tidy my garden?” she repeated with her hands on her hips. She didn’t know why she was acting so angry with him, just a force of habit probably, because if he had tidied it he had done her a huge favor. It was just annoying to keep returning home to see another section of her garden cleared and to not know who was doing it.

  “When?” Richard looked around at the others frantically, as though he had been accused of murder.

  “Oh, I don’t know when,” she snapped. “During the days for the past few weeks.”

  “No, Holly,” he snapped back. “Some of us have to work, you know.”

  Holly glared at him and her father interjected. “What’s this, love, is someone working on your garden?”

  “Yes, but I don’t know who,” she mumbled, rubbing her forehead and trying to think again. “Is it you, Dad?”

  Frank shook his head wildly, hoping his daughter hadn’t finally lost the plot.

  “Is it you, Declan?”

  “Eh … think about it, Holly,” he said sarcastically.


  “Is it you?” she turned to the stranger standing next to her father.

  “Um … no, I just flew into Dublin … um … for the … um, weekend,” he replied nervously with an English accent.

  Ciara started laughing. “Let me help you, Holly. Is anybody here working on Holly’s garden?” she yelled to the rest of the party. Everybody stopped what they were doing and shook their heads with blank expressions on their faces.

  “Now wasn’t that much easier?” Ciara cackled.

  Holly shook her head with disbelief at her sister and joined Denise, Tom and Daniel on the far side of the garden.

  “Hi, Daniel.” Holly leaned over to greet Daniel with a kiss on the cheek.

  “Hi, Holly, long time no see.” He handed her a can from beside him.

  “You still haven’t found that leprechaun?” Denise laughed.

  “No,” Holly said, stretching her legs out in front of her and resting back on her elbows. “But it is just so odd!” She explained the story to Tom and Daniel.

  “Do you think maybe your husband organized it?” Tom blurted out, and Daniel threw his friend a look.

  “No,” Holly said, looking away, angry that a stranger knew her private business, “it’s not part of that.” She scowled at Denise for telling Tom.

  Denise just held her hands up helplessly and shrugged.

  “Thanks for coming, Daniel.” Holly turned to him, ignoring the other two.

  “No problem at all, I was glad to come.”

  It was weird seeing him out of his usual wintery clothes; he was dressed in a navy vest and navy combat shorts that went just below his knees with a pair of navy trainers. She watched his biceps as he took a slug of his beer. She had had no idea he was that fit.

  “You’re very brown,” she commented, trying to think of an excuse for being caught staring at his biceps.

  “And so are you,” he said, purposely staring at her legs.

  Holly laughed and tucked them up underneath her. “A result of unemployment, what’s your excuse?”

  “I was in Miami for a while last month.”

  “Ooh, lucky you, did you enjoy it?”

  “Had a great time,” he nodded, smiling. “Have you ever been?”

  She shook her head. “But at least us girls are heading off to Spain next week. Can’t wait.” She rubbed her hands together excitedly.