PS, I Love You

  “Oh dear,” Richard joked. “Looks like we were wrong, Holly, the McDonald’s did kill Timmy.”

  Holly looked at her brother in shock for calling his son Timmy but she decided not to mention it, it was obviously just a slip of the tongue. Richard got up and threw Timmy over his shoulder. “Well, we better go bury him now and have a funeral.” Timmy giggled as he dangled upside down on his father’s shoulder.

  “Oh, he’s alive!” Richard laughed.

  “No, I’m not,” giggled Timmy.

  Holly watched in amusement at the family scene before her. It had been a while since she had witnessed anything like this. None of her friends had any children and Holly was very rarely around them. There was obviously something seriously wrong with her if she was doting on Richard’s children. And it wasn’t the wisest decision to become broody when there was no man in your life.

  “OK, we best be off,” laughed Richard. “Bye, Holly.”

  “Bye, Holly,” the children cheered, and Holly watched Richard walk off with Timmy slung over his right shoulder as little Emily skipped and danced along beside her father while gripping his hand.

  Holly stared in amusement at the stranger walking off with two children. Who was this man who claimed to be her brother? Holly certainly had never met that man before.

  Twenty-three

  BARBARA FINISHED SERVING HER CUSTOMERS, and as soon as they left the building she ran into the staff room and lit up a cigarette. The travel agent’s had been so busy all day that she had had to work through her lunch break. Melissa, her work mate, had called in sick that morning, although Barbara knew very well she had partied too hard the night before and any sickness she might have had was only self-inflicted. So she was stuck in this boring job all by herself today. And of course it was the busiest day they’d had in ages. As soon as November came with those horrible depressing dark nights and dark mornings and piercing winds and sheets of rain, everyone came running in the door booking holidays to beautiful hot sunny countries. Barbara shuddered as she heard the wind rattle the windows and made a note to herself to check for any special holiday deals.

  With her boss finally out to run some errands, Barbara was really looking forward to her cigarette break. Of course, just her luck, the bell over the door sounded just then and Barbara cursed the customer entering the shop for disturbing her precious break. She puffed on the cigarette furiously, almost making herself dizzy, reapplied her glossy red lipstick and sprayed perfume all around the room so her boss wouldn’t notice the smoke. She left the staff room expecting to see a customer sitting behind the counter, but instead the old man was still slowly making his way to the counter. Barbara tried not to stare and began pressing random buttons on the keypad.

  “Excuse me?” she heard the man’s weak voice call to her.

  “Hello sir, how can I help you?” she said for the hundredth time that day. She didn’t mean to be rude by staring at him, but she was surprised at how young the man actually was. From far away his slumped figure looked elderly. His body was hunched and the walking stick in his hand seemed to be the only thing preventing him from collapsing on the floor in front of her. His skin was very white and pasty, as though he hadn’t seen the sun for years, but he had big brown puppy eyes that seemed to smile at her. She couldn’t help but smile back at him.

  “I was hoping to book a holiday,” he said quietly, “but I was wondering if you could help me choose a place.”

  Usually Barbara would have silently screamed at the customer for making her do this unbelievably impossible task. Most of her customers were so fussy that she could be sitting there for hours with them flicking through brochures and trying to persuade them where to go when the truth was she really couldn’t give a toss where they went. But this man seemed pleasant, so she was glad to help. She surprised herself.

  “No problem, sir, why don’t you take a seat there and we’ll search through the brochures.” She pointed to the chair in front of her and looked away again so she didn’t have to watch his struggle to sit down.

  “Now,” she said, full of smiles, “is there any country in particular that you would like to go to?”

  “Em … Spain … Lanzarote, I think.”

  Barbara was glad; this was going to be a lot easier than she thought.

  “And is it a summer holiday you’re looking for?”

  He nodded slowly.

  They worked their way through the brochures and finally the man found a place that he liked. Barbara was happy that he took her advice into account, unlike some of her other customers, who just ignored every single bit of her knowledge. She should know what was best for them, it being her job and all.

  “OK, any month in particular?” she said, looking at the prices.

  “August?” he asked, and those big brown eyes looked so deep into Barbara’s soul she just wanted to jump over the counter and give him a big hug.

  “August is a good month,” she agreed with him. “Would you like a sea view or a pool view? The sea view is an extra thirty euro,” she added quickly.

  He stared into space with a smile on his face as though he were already there. “A sea view, please.”

  “Good choice. Can I take your name and address, please?”

  “Oh … this isn’t actually for me … it’s a surprise for my wife and her friends.”

  Those brown eyes looked sad.

  Barbara cleared her throat nervously. “Well, that’s very thoughtful of you, sir,” she felt she had to add. “Could I have their names then, please?”

  She finished taking his details and he settled the bill. She began to print the arrangements from the computer to give to him.

  “Oh, do you mind if I leave the details here with you? I want to surprise my wife and I would be afraid of leaving papers around the house in case she finds them.”

  Barbara smiled; what a lucky wife he had.

  “I won’t be telling her till July, so do you think it could be kept quiet till then?”

  “That’s no problem at all, sir, usually the flight times aren’t confirmed till a few weeks before anyway, so we would have no reason to call her. I’ll give the other staff strict instructions not to call the house.”

  “Thank you for your help, Barbara,” he said, smiling sadly with those puppy eyes.

  “It’s been a pleasure, Mr. … Clarke?”

  “It’s Gerry.” He smiled again.

  “Well, it’s been a pleasure, Gerry, I’m sure your wife will have a wonderful time. My friend went there last year and she loved it.” Barbara felt the need to reassure him his wife would be fine.

  “Well, I better head back home before they think I’ve been kidnapped. I’m not even supposed to be out of bed, you know.” He laughed again and a lump formed in Barbara’s throat.

  Barbara jumped to her feet and ran around the other side of the counter to hold the door open for him. He smiled appreciatively as he walked past her and she watched as he slowly climbed into the taxi that had been waiting outside for him. Just as Barbara was about to close the door her boss walked in and it banged against his head. She looked over at Gerry, who was still waiting in the taxi to move out onto the road and he laughed and gave her the thumbs-up.

  Her boss threw her a look for leaving the counter unattended and marched into the staff room. “Barbara,” he yelled, “have you been smoking in here again?” She rolled her eyes and turned to face him.

  “God, what’s wrong with you? You look like you’re about to burst into tears.”

  It was the first of July and Barbara sat grumpily behind the counter of Swords Travel Agents. Every day she had worked this summer had been a beautiful sunny day, and the last two days she had off it had pissed down with rain. Today was typically the complete opposite. It was the hottest day of the year, all her customers kept bragging as they strolled in, wearing their little shorts and skimpy tops, filling the room with the smell of coconut sun cream. Barbara squirmed in her chair in her uncomfortable and incredibly itchy u
niform. She felt like she was back at school again. She banged on the fan once more as it suddenly stalled.

  “Oh, leave it, Barbara,” Melissa moaned. “That’ll only make it worse.”

  “As if that could be possible,” she grumbled, and spun around in her chair to face the computer, where she pounded on the keypad.

  “What is it with you today?” Melissa laughed.

  “Oh, nothing much,” Barbara said through gritted teeth, “it’s just the hottest day of the year and we’re stuck in this crappy job in this stuffy room with no air-conditioning in these horrible itchy uniforms.” She shouted each word toward her boss’s office, hoping he would hear. “That’s all.”

  Melissa sniggered. “Look, why don’t you go outside for a few minutes to get some air and I’ll deal with this next customer,” she said, nodding to the woman making her way in.

  “Thanks, Mel,” Barbara said, relieved at finally being able to escape. She grabbed her cigarettes. “Right, I’m going to get some fresh air.”

  Melissa looked down at Barbara’s hand and rolled her eyes. “Hello, can I help you?” she smiled at the woman.

  “Yes, I was wondering if Barbara still works here?”

  Barbara froze just as she was reaching the door and contemplated whether to run outside or go back to work. She groaned and headed back to her seat. She looked at the woman behind the counter; she was pretty, she decided, but her eyes looked like they were going to pop out of her head as she stared frantically from one girl to the other.

  “Yes, I’m Barbara.”

  “Oh good!” The lady looked relieved and she dived onto the stool in front of her. “I was afraid you might not work here anymore.”

  “She wishes,” Melissa muttered under her breath and received an elbow in the stomach from Barbara.

  “Can I help you?”

  “Oh God, I really hope you can,” the lady said a bit hysterically and rooted through her bag. Barbara raised her eyebrows over at Melissa and the two of them tried to hold in their laughs.

  “OK,” she said, eventually pulling out a crumpled envelope from her bag. “I received this today from my husband and I was wondering if you could explain it to me.”

  Barbara frowned as she stared at the crumpled piece of paper on the counter. A page had been torn out of a holiday brochure and written on it were the words: “Swords Travel Agents. Attn: Barbara.”

  Barbara frowned again and looked at the page more closely. “My friend went there two years ago on holiday, but other than that it means nothing to me. Did you not get any more information?”

  The lady shook her head vigorously.

  “Well, can’t you ask your husband for more information?” Barbara was confused.

  “No, he’s not here anymore,” she said sadly, and tears welled in her eyes. Barbara panicked; if her boss saw her making someone cry she would really be given her marching orders. She was on her last warning as it was.

  “OK then, can I take your name and maybe it will come up on the computer.”

  “It’s Holly Kennedy.” Her voice shook.

  “Holly Kennedy, Holly Kennedy.” Melissa repeated her name after listening in on their conversation, “that name rings a bell. Oh, hold on, I was about to call you this week! That’s weird! I was under strict instructions from Barbara not to ring you until July for some reason …”

  “Oh!” Barbara interrupted her friend, finally realizing what was going on. “You’re Gerry’s wife?” she asked hopefully.

  “Yes!” Holly threw her hands to her face in shock. “He was in here?”

  “Yes he was,” Barbara smiled encouragingly. “He was a lovely man,” she said, reaching out to Holly’s hand on the counter.

  Melissa stared at the two of them, not knowing what was going on. Barbara’s heart went out to the lady across the counter, she was so young and it must be so hard for her right now. But Barbara was delighted to be the bearer of good news. “Melissa, can you get Holly some tissues, please, while I explain to her exactly why her husband was here?” She beamed across the counter at Holly.

  She let go of Holly’s hand to tap away at the computer and Melissa returned with a box of tissues. “OK, Holly,” she said softly. “Gerry has arranged a holiday for you and a Sharon McCarthy and a Denise Hennessey to go to Lanzarote for one week, arriving on the twenty-eighth of July to return home on the third of August.”

  Holly’s hands flew to her face in shock and tears poured from her eyes.

  “He was adamant that he find the perfect place for you,” Barbara continued, delighted at her new role. She felt like one of those female television hosts who spring surprises on their guests. “That’s the place you’re going to,” she said, tapping the crumpled page in front of her. “You’ll have a fab time, believe me, my friend was there two years ago like I said already, and she just loved it. There are loads of restaurants and bars around and …” She trailed off, realizing Holly probably didn’t give a damn about whether she had a good time or not.

  “When did he come in?” Holly asked, still in shock.

  Barbara, glad to help in her new role, happily tapped away on the computer. “The booking was made on the twenty-eighth of November.”

  “November?” Holly gasped. “He shouldn’t even have been out of bed then! Was he on his own?”

  “Yes, but there was a taxi waiting outside for him the whole time.”

  “What time of day was this?” Holly asked quickly.

  “I’m sorry but I really can’t remember. It was quite a long time ago—”

  “Yes, of course, I’m sorry,” Holly interrupted.

  Barbara completely understood. If that was her husband, well, if she ever met someone worth becoming her husband, she would also want to know every single detail. Barbara told her as much as she could remember until Holly could think of no more questions to ask.

  “Oh, thank you, Barbara, thank you so much.” Holly reached over the counter and gave her a big hug.

  “No problem at all.” She hugged her back, feeling satisfied with her good deed of the day. “Come back and let us know how you get on,” she smiled. “Here’s your details.” She handed her a thick envelope and watched her walk out of the room. She sighed, thinking the crappy job might not be so crappy after all.

  “What on earth was that all about?” Melissa was dying to find out. Barbara began to explain the story.

  “OK, girls, I’m taking my break now. Barbara, no smoking in the staff room.” Their boss closed and locked his door and then turned around to face them. “Christ Almighty, what are you two crying about now?”

  Twenty-four

  HOLLY EVENTUALLY ARRIVED AT HER house and waved to Sharon and Denise, who were sitting on her garden wall bathing in the sun. They jumped up as soon as they saw her and rushed over to greet her.

  “God, you both got here quick,” she said, trying to inject energy into her voice. She felt completely and utterly drained, and she really wasn’t in the mood to have to explain everything to the girls right now. But she would have to.

  “Sharon left work as soon as you called and she collected me from town,” Denise explained, studying Holly’s face and trying to assess how bad the situation was.

  “Oh, you didn’t have to do that,” Holly said lifelessly as she put the key in the door.

  “Hey, have you been working in your garden?” Sharon asked, looking around and trying to lighten the atmosphere.

  “No, my neighbor’s been doing it, I think.” Holly pulled the key from the door and searched through the bunch for the correct one.

  “You think?” Denise tried to keep the conversation going while Holly battled with yet another key in the lock.

  “Well, it’s either my neighbor or a little leprechaun lives down the end of my garden,” she snapped, getting frustrated with the keys. Denise and Sharon looked at each other and tried to figure out what to do. They motioned to each other to stay quiet, as Holly was obviously stressed and finding it difficult to remember wh
ich key went in the door.

  “Oh, fuck it!” Holly yelled and threw her keys on the ground. Denise jumped back, just managing to keep the heavy bunch from slamming into her ankles.

  Sharon picked them up. “Hey, hun, don’t worry about it,” she said lightheartedly. “This happens to me all the time, I swear the bloody things jump around on the key ring deliberately just to piss us off.”

  Holly smiled wearily, thankful that somebody else could take control for a while. Sharon slowly worked her way through the keys, talking calmly to her in a singsong voice as though speaking to a child. The door finally opened and Holly rushed in to turn the alarm off. Thankfully she remembered the number, the year Gerry and she had met, and the year they got married.

  “OK, why don’t you two make yourselves comfortable in the living room and I’ll follow you in a minute.” Sharon and Denise did as they were told while Holly headed into the toilet to splash cold water on her face. She needed to snap out of this daze, take control of her body and be as excited about this holiday as Gerry had intended. When she felt a little more alive she joined the girls in the living room.

  She pulled the footrest over to the couch and sat opposite the girls.

  “OK, I’m not going to drag this one out. I opened the envelope for July today and this is what it said.” She rooted in her bag for the small card that had been attached to the brochure and handed it to the girls. It read:

  Have a good Holly day!

  PS, I love you …

  “Is that it?” Denise wrinkled up her nose, unimpressed. Sharon nudged her in the ribs. “Ow!”

  “Well, Holly, I think it’s a lovely note,” Sharon lied. “It’s so thoughtful and it’s … a lovely play on words.”

  Holly had to giggle. She knew Sharon was lying because she always flared her nostrils when she wasn’t telling the truth. “No, you fool!” she said, hitting Sharon over the head with a cushion.